Bracket advice from someone who knows next to nothing about college basketball

I'm a huge sports fan. Pretty much anything involving a ball and terrible officials is cool in my book. Of course with so many options out there, one can only have so many areas of expertise. So I stick to being able to break down the specifics of completely insignificant events in the second quarter of a football game. Basketball is not my thing. Somehow I can't bring myself to try to analyze a sport with such high scores. When you can turn on a game in the first half, see your team down by 15 points, and not be worried, there aren't enough significant events in the game to be able to appreciate the insignificant ones. That said, since everyone and their brother's coworkers fill out a bracket, I thought I would dish out my bracketology wisdom. Here my 10 rules to follow. Oh, and keep in mind that this applies only to people with any sense of decency that therefore only fill out one bracket (or at least one bracket per pool).
1) No lower seed than a 3 makes it to the Final Four. A lower seed makes it every now and then, but you'll kill a large handful of brackets before you finally get it right.
2) At the very minimum, take your 1 and 2 seeds to the Sweet Sixteen. Trust me. I broke that rule this year. I had Duke losing to Louisville. As a result, instead of missing on 2 lock Sweet Sixteen games due to collossal upsets, I missed out on 3. There are always big upsets, but going all out to get them right is like going all in with 4 cards in a row, hoping for a 9 in the river to complete your straight. It's like throwing a hail mary pass on 3rd and 1 in the middle of the 3rd quarter because it just might work. Just stick with what will probably happen, take a few upsets in stride and let other people suffer as the team they had getting upset makes a big run.
3) If you think you just have to pick some upsets (it does make it a bit more fun), go with the schools that have unique names. The Bucknells, Cornells, and George Mason's have done a lot more upsetting than the San Diego State's.
4) When it comes to 8 vs 9 and 7 vs 10 games, just go with whoever has a cooler name. It's too close to call anyway. Along with that:
5) As long as it doesn't break one of the previous rules, pick Gonzaga and Xavier to win atleast one game. Just try and tell me you won't feel some degree of satisfaction from picking from the two coolest names in the tourney.
6) If there's a 1 seed that everyone is chiming about how over rated they are, pick them to go far. People forget that being over rated doesn't mean that they're bad. An over rated 1 seed is still better than most 2's as well as everybody else. Since not as many people will have them going far, it's worth at shot.
7) Pick your favorite team to win less games than you think they will. You probably have an over-inflated view of their talent. And if they do make a run, you get to be a fan and watch them go. You'll be getting your reward. The bracket isn't everything.
8) Treat celebrity picks like celebrity political advice; Especially if it's from Obama.
9) If you're in a pool, know the fan base demographics of your co-competitors and avoid picking their teams to win it all like the plague. There's no worse feeling than being just a few points back of the leader going into the Final Four and realizing you have the same team winning.
10) Take my advice with a grain of salt. Every year I've played my bracket against a bracket that takes 100% favorites. Every year, my bracket has lost.