So I don't know if anybody's still reading this. I'm going to try something this NFL season-give my picks for the winners of NFL games with a brief explanation or commentary. Hopefully it will be somewhat amusing/interesting.
WEEK 1
NFC
MIN vs NO-This is an after the fact post, but I did have New Orleans picked before hand for the reason that I didn't think Brett Favre would have had time to gel with the offense due to a late entry to training camp. I was dead on as Favre was especially out of sink with Percy Harvin.
DET vs CHI-I'm not about to put much faith in the Jay Cutler lead Bears, and the Lions are a team that is improving (well, at least we hope a few good draft picks and moves can improve from 2 wins over the last 2 seasons), however, the Lions aren't there yet. I'll take the Bears.
CAR vs NYG-I want to go with Carolina, but they're the prototypical team that was bad but then looked good down the stretch last season. I've found that both with players and teams, looking good down the stretch of a hopeless season usually doesn't translate into success next year. The Giant's season was opposite of Carolina's, but I'll take their more proven core of players to win.
GB vs PHI-Have to take Green Bay. Their offense is better than the Philly D, and barring an explosive performance by Kevin Kolb, the Eagles won't be able to keep up with the heralded NFC favorites. Look for the Eagles to be a lot better late in the season.
ARI vs STL-Derek Anderson fooled us into thinking he was good for one season. He'll be able to do it for a few weeks with the likes of Larry Fitzgerald, especially against St. Louis. Cards win.
SF vs SEA-When a fairly big name player like TJ Houshmanzada leaves the team he played for his whole career for a new team in free agency, and then gets cut after an unproductive, unmotivated first season, that's probably not a franchise that's going anywhere. The 49ers, the expected surprise team, have a lot more upside. I'll put my gold on San Fransisco.
DAL vs WSH-If you thought the physicality of the Dallas defense made McNabb look bad at the end of last year, wait 'till you see him with only the Washington wide receivers to throw to. I'll take the Cowboys with little worries.
AFC
DEN vs JAC-I've never thought that Kyle Orton was all that bad of a QB. He'll get the job done against the Jaguars, who I have absolutely no idea what to expect from this year (other than a lot of Maurice Jones-Drew. Fantasy team, baby!!!). Broncos.
OAK vs TEN-The last time I picked the Raiders, the lost by 40 or so points to a bad team (I think the Bills). I'd much prefer to take the Titans who might be that pesky team that the really good teams just can't seem to put away with Chris Johnson and Vince Young QB scrambles to try to stop. Easy pick, Titans.
CIN vs NE-Chances are, I'm too high on the Bengals and too low on the Patriots, but it'll take learning the hard way for me to figure that out. Bengals.
MIA vs BUF-Miami. 'nough said.
IND vs HOU-Houston has the nostalgic appeal. The team that's been getting good but hasn't been able to crack the playoffs finally looking ready to be great with a big time week 1 division game to get it's magical season started. But nostalgia isn't a good sports law, especially when we don't even know how good they are yet. I'll take the team that should have been 16-0 last year.
BAL vs NYJ-The Ravens are my preseason Super Bowl pick. The Jets are the team that I think will leave its expectations the most unfulfilled. Yet for some reason, I'm taking the Jets. I'm going to hope this is some sort of uncanny gut feeling, not some sort of nostalgia.
SD vs KC-The Chiefs established themselves as a black hole last year by wiping the previous season's "from a nobody to a household name" player off the face of the earth. Matt Cassell who? I'll take the Chargers.
INT
CLE vs TB-If Tampa Bay does well, they might be an average team. I don't expect much. And they aren't the Cardinals in the playoffs, so Jake Delhomme should do well enough for the win. Browns.
ATL vs PIT-This one's a duzie. Picking Atlanta would be based entirely on them returning to what they were able to do two years ago. Picking Pittsburg would be based entirely on wanting to see a run-first college QB succeed in the NFL. So I'll go a different route. I'll base my pick entirely on Troy Polamalu's $1,000,000 insured hair. The Steelers defense is a heck of a lot better with Troy in there. Steelers.
Stay posted for weekly picks, probably appearing in the friday to saturday range.
Friday, September 10, 2010
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Please, National League. Just add the DH
Baseball. America’s great pastime. Ever wonder why it’s merely a pastime, rather than the most popular sport? Tradition mostly. While other sports continue to evolve, baseball is played pretty much the same as it was years ago. They’ve gotten bigger, faster, stronger, and hopefully better, but it’s still essentially the same game. They refuse to use instant replay, because we all know that taking a minute or two to look at a play is too long for a game that has a designated stretch time for fans. Take the Designated Hitter. The one major renovation to game play in a long while, yet baseball traditionalists hate it. No, the DH doesn’t make sense playing in your back yard, but when we’re talking about elite levels of play, it’s the only sensible option. Pitching at the major league level is incredibly difficult. Individuals devote their whole lives learning the trade. Hitting at the major league level is incredibly difficult. Individuals devote their whole lives to learning the trade. Sorry folks, but no one has two lifetimes to devote to anything, much less baseball. Asking a pitcher to hit is like asking the blacksmith to sing at the opera on weekends. Every once in a while, one of them might have enough natural talent to get by and not look completely terrible, but it’s not what they have been, or should be, working on. Yet, because people still find the double switch to be such a fascinating move of managerial brilliance, everyone who disagrees is labeled as unsophisticated. So, in the name of strategizing and sophistication, I’m introducing some rule changes to other sports.
Football. Every ninth defensive play, the quarterback has to play middle linebacker. Since everyone knows that Peyton Manning wouldn’t even be able to get off of a block by Darren Sproles, the whole defense will have to devise a scheme that essentially allows him to stand there and do nothing. Now that’ll make the game more exciting. And you know how in the best case scenario when the pitcher gets a hit, they barely let him run and certainly forbid him to slide so that he doesn’t get hurt? That one time when Peyton actually splits two blockers and finds himself one on one with the running back, he’ll be under strict orders not to so much as extend him right arm trying to make the tackle. Oh, the strategy! Once this rule takes effect, there’ll be no going back!
Basketball. Every ninth minute, the coaching staff has to go in and play and the players have to coach. Think of the strategy this’ll induce! Now age, size, and stature comes into play when you’re hiring a coach! Not to mention each team will have to hire a wardrobe design crew to come up with the most comfortable, athletic friendly clothes that also fit the NBA’s coaching dress code. Not to mention that those minutes will be extremely fan friendly. So bad that it’s great.
Golf. Every ninth shot has to be swung the opposite way. So Tiger Woods has to hit left handed. But get this. He still has to use his right handed clubs. So now on his eighth shot, he has to either lay it up for an easy shot or risk having to try to chop it out of the sand trap left handed.
NASCAR. Pretty simple. Pit chief drives every ninth lap. That way, just when you’ve started to build up speed and get things rolling, you have to stop and let the pit chief drive a lap, then switch again and start over.
Soccer. Every ninth shot, the goal keeper can’t use his hands. Now I think we can all agree on the brilliance of this rule. When that ninth shot is coming up, the defenders have to start playing tight to try and prevent a chip shot, the goal keeper has to switch to playing a completely different style, and soccer will have its equivalent of the foul shot. It should be so easy to score, but because everyone is so focused on getting off the right kind of shot because it’s so easy, certain players would struggle miserably, to the amusement of us all.
The basic point of all of this sarcasm being: If you’re the top level of a professional sport, don’t bring down the level of competition by asking players to do things that we all know they can’t do. Rally killing at bats by pitchers are not in the best interest of the sport. Not to mention that American League pitchers are forced to become more mentally tough because they face nine batters over and over. They don’t get a free pass every ninth hitter. But, then again, who am I to try and take away the enjoyment of watching pitchers take three ugly hacks at pitches out of the strike zone and walk back to the bench.
Football. Every ninth defensive play, the quarterback has to play middle linebacker. Since everyone knows that Peyton Manning wouldn’t even be able to get off of a block by Darren Sproles, the whole defense will have to devise a scheme that essentially allows him to stand there and do nothing. Now that’ll make the game more exciting. And you know how in the best case scenario when the pitcher gets a hit, they barely let him run and certainly forbid him to slide so that he doesn’t get hurt? That one time when Peyton actually splits two blockers and finds himself one on one with the running back, he’ll be under strict orders not to so much as extend him right arm trying to make the tackle. Oh, the strategy! Once this rule takes effect, there’ll be no going back!
Basketball. Every ninth minute, the coaching staff has to go in and play and the players have to coach. Think of the strategy this’ll induce! Now age, size, and stature comes into play when you’re hiring a coach! Not to mention each team will have to hire a wardrobe design crew to come up with the most comfortable, athletic friendly clothes that also fit the NBA’s coaching dress code. Not to mention that those minutes will be extremely fan friendly. So bad that it’s great.
Golf. Every ninth shot has to be swung the opposite way. So Tiger Woods has to hit left handed. But get this. He still has to use his right handed clubs. So now on his eighth shot, he has to either lay it up for an easy shot or risk having to try to chop it out of the sand trap left handed.
NASCAR. Pretty simple. Pit chief drives every ninth lap. That way, just when you’ve started to build up speed and get things rolling, you have to stop and let the pit chief drive a lap, then switch again and start over.
Soccer. Every ninth shot, the goal keeper can’t use his hands. Now I think we can all agree on the brilliance of this rule. When that ninth shot is coming up, the defenders have to start playing tight to try and prevent a chip shot, the goal keeper has to switch to playing a completely different style, and soccer will have its equivalent of the foul shot. It should be so easy to score, but because everyone is so focused on getting off the right kind of shot because it’s so easy, certain players would struggle miserably, to the amusement of us all.
The basic point of all of this sarcasm being: If you’re the top level of a professional sport, don’t bring down the level of competition by asking players to do things that we all know they can’t do. Rally killing at bats by pitchers are not in the best interest of the sport. Not to mention that American League pitchers are forced to become more mentally tough because they face nine batters over and over. They don’t get a free pass every ninth hitter. But, then again, who am I to try and take away the enjoyment of watching pitchers take three ugly hacks at pitches out of the strike zone and walk back to the bench.
Monday, March 22, 2010
Bracket advice from someone who knows next to nothing about college basketball
I'm a huge sports fan. Pretty much anything involving a ball and terrible officials is cool in my book. Of course with so many options out there, one can only have so many areas of expertise. So I stick to being able to break down the specifics of completely insignificant events in the second quarter of a football game. Basketball is not my thing. Somehow I can't bring myself to try to analyze a sport with such high scores. When you can turn on a game in the first half, see your team down by 15 points, and not be worried, there aren't enough significant events in the game to be able to appreciate the insignificant ones. That said, since everyone and their brother's coworkers fill out a bracket, I thought I would dish out my bracketology wisdom. Here my 10 rules to follow. Oh, and keep in mind that this applies only to people with any sense of decency that therefore only fill out one bracket (or at least one bracket per pool).
1) No lower seed than a 3 makes it to the Final Four. A lower seed makes it every now and then, but you'll kill a large handful of brackets before you finally get it right.
2) At the very minimum, take your 1 and 2 seeds to the Sweet Sixteen. Trust me. I broke that rule this year. I had Duke losing to Louisville. As a result, instead of missing on 2 lock Sweet Sixteen games due to collossal upsets, I missed out on 3. There are always big upsets, but going all out to get them right is like going all in with 4 cards in a row, hoping for a 9 in the river to complete your straight. It's like throwing a hail mary pass on 3rd and 1 in the middle of the 3rd quarter because it just might work. Just stick with what will probably happen, take a few upsets in stride and let other people suffer as the team they had getting upset makes a big run.
3) If you think you just have to pick some upsets (it does make it a bit more fun), go with the schools that have unique names. The Bucknells, Cornells, and George Mason's have done a lot more upsetting than the San Diego State's.
4) When it comes to 8 vs 9 and 7 vs 10 games, just go with whoever has a cooler name. It's too close to call anyway. Along with that:
5) As long as it doesn't break one of the previous rules, pick Gonzaga and Xavier to win atleast one game. Just try and tell me you won't feel some degree of satisfaction from picking from the two coolest names in the tourney.
6) If there's a 1 seed that everyone is chiming about how over rated they are, pick them to go far. People forget that being over rated doesn't mean that they're bad. An over rated 1 seed is still better than most 2's as well as everybody else. Since not as many people will have them going far, it's worth at shot.
7) Pick your favorite team to win less games than you think they will. You probably have an over-inflated view of their talent. And if they do make a run, you get to be a fan and watch them go. You'll be getting your reward. The bracket isn't everything.
8) Treat celebrity picks like celebrity political advice; Especially if it's from Obama.
9) If you're in a pool, know the fan base demographics of your co-competitors and avoid picking their teams to win it all like the plague. There's no worse feeling than being just a few points back of the leader going into the Final Four and realizing you have the same team winning.
10) Take my advice with a grain of salt. Every year I've played my bracket against a bracket that takes 100% favorites. Every year, my bracket has lost.
1) No lower seed than a 3 makes it to the Final Four. A lower seed makes it every now and then, but you'll kill a large handful of brackets before you finally get it right.
2) At the very minimum, take your 1 and 2 seeds to the Sweet Sixteen. Trust me. I broke that rule this year. I had Duke losing to Louisville. As a result, instead of missing on 2 lock Sweet Sixteen games due to collossal upsets, I missed out on 3. There are always big upsets, but going all out to get them right is like going all in with 4 cards in a row, hoping for a 9 in the river to complete your straight. It's like throwing a hail mary pass on 3rd and 1 in the middle of the 3rd quarter because it just might work. Just stick with what will probably happen, take a few upsets in stride and let other people suffer as the team they had getting upset makes a big run.
3) If you think you just have to pick some upsets (it does make it a bit more fun), go with the schools that have unique names. The Bucknells, Cornells, and George Mason's have done a lot more upsetting than the San Diego State's.
4) When it comes to 8 vs 9 and 7 vs 10 games, just go with whoever has a cooler name. It's too close to call anyway. Along with that:
5) As long as it doesn't break one of the previous rules, pick Gonzaga and Xavier to win atleast one game. Just try and tell me you won't feel some degree of satisfaction from picking from the two coolest names in the tourney.
6) If there's a 1 seed that everyone is chiming about how over rated they are, pick them to go far. People forget that being over rated doesn't mean that they're bad. An over rated 1 seed is still better than most 2's as well as everybody else. Since not as many people will have them going far, it's worth at shot.
7) Pick your favorite team to win less games than you think they will. You probably have an over-inflated view of their talent. And if they do make a run, you get to be a fan and watch them go. You'll be getting your reward. The bracket isn't everything.
8) Treat celebrity picks like celebrity political advice; Especially if it's from Obama.
9) If you're in a pool, know the fan base demographics of your co-competitors and avoid picking their teams to win it all like the plague. There's no worse feeling than being just a few points back of the leader going into the Final Four and realizing you have the same team winning.
10) Take my advice with a grain of salt. Every year I've played my bracket against a bracket that takes 100% favorites. Every year, my bracket has lost.
Saturday, March 20, 2010
When the Whistle Blows
The final seconds tick away. Parents and classmates clap. Players bend over for a few moments of rest before heading back to the sidelines, letting the major moments of the game pass through memory. It was a roughly played game with a disappointing outcome. As players criss-cross on the way to their respective benches, they avoid eye contact, remembering the dirty foul on their star player, the cheap shot behind the referee’s back, and the frequent shoving and jostling for position. At the moment, they want absolutely nothing to do with the other team, yet out of tradition, and fear of a coach’s punishment, they line up and go to congratulate the opponent. The teams pass each other, slapping hands and giving kudos 100 percent with their hands and mouths, and 0 percent with their hearts. And all this is done in the name of sportsmanship.
A long-standing tradition in high school sports, the team handshake following a game is generally viewed as a classy show of respect for the opponents. However, it all too often becomes a ritualistic exchange of scowls and sometimes unfriendly chatter. In order to prevent doing more harm than good, and to allow more freedom in expressing true sportsmanship, lining up and shaking hands with the other team after a high school game should not be a mandatory action.
Parents and fans may be surprised to find out that these exchanges aren’t always as positive as they seem. Yes, there are many times when it is a friendly exchange between players and coaches, and yes, lots of high school athletes do display good sportsmanship in victory or defeat. In hard-fought competitions, humiliating blow-outs, and rivalry games, however, post-game interactions can easily become less than friendly. Putting aside one’s anger, humiliation, or dislike of the opponent in the heat of the moment following a game takes a lot of self-control and maturity, something that many high school students simply don’t possess. While being gracious to the opponent despite the outcome is a quality trait that should be taught, if players haven’t learned it through years of post-game handshakes in youth leagues, then only coaches, parents, and other role models can effectively encourage them to display a better attitude.
As for the players who are genuinely interested in congratulating a specific player, the current system can actually hinder them from doing so. They might be able to exchange a few words with an opponent or two after the game on their way back to the sidelines, but players are usually encouraged to hurry back to get in line for the hand shake. Then, as the teams pass each other, there is about one second in which to say something to a specific player. After that, it’s hurry back for the coach’s post-game speech, load the bus, and get out of there, leaving minimal opportunities to show true, heartfelt sportsmanship.
What, then, is the solution? In almost all professional sports, the final whistle is followed by several minutes of mingling, shaking hands, and exchanging words with opponents. Some players take the time to congratulate several other players, and some head to the locker room right away. Players that are in the spotlight are commended for displaying good sportsmanship, and criticized when they do not. Thus, this informal system can actually encourage a more positive display of emotions. While it is easy to hide poor sportsmanship behind a mass handshake, leaving the field without talking to or at least shaking hands with an opponent is much more obvious. With the right influences from coaches or parents, a player would be more likely to linger on the field and find a few people to congratulate. Even if it starts only as another ritual, it is possible that the more personal interaction could change the player’s attitude.
Sportsmanship is an honorable display of character that athletes should strive to learn. Few ways of learning are more effective than simply putting something into practice, and an unstructured post-game system would allow an open setting for high schoolers to do so. When the whistle blows, will they be in a learning environment, or a ritualistic one?
A long-standing tradition in high school sports, the team handshake following a game is generally viewed as a classy show of respect for the opponents. However, it all too often becomes a ritualistic exchange of scowls and sometimes unfriendly chatter. In order to prevent doing more harm than good, and to allow more freedom in expressing true sportsmanship, lining up and shaking hands with the other team after a high school game should not be a mandatory action.
Parents and fans may be surprised to find out that these exchanges aren’t always as positive as they seem. Yes, there are many times when it is a friendly exchange between players and coaches, and yes, lots of high school athletes do display good sportsmanship in victory or defeat. In hard-fought competitions, humiliating blow-outs, and rivalry games, however, post-game interactions can easily become less than friendly. Putting aside one’s anger, humiliation, or dislike of the opponent in the heat of the moment following a game takes a lot of self-control and maturity, something that many high school students simply don’t possess. While being gracious to the opponent despite the outcome is a quality trait that should be taught, if players haven’t learned it through years of post-game handshakes in youth leagues, then only coaches, parents, and other role models can effectively encourage them to display a better attitude.
As for the players who are genuinely interested in congratulating a specific player, the current system can actually hinder them from doing so. They might be able to exchange a few words with an opponent or two after the game on their way back to the sidelines, but players are usually encouraged to hurry back to get in line for the hand shake. Then, as the teams pass each other, there is about one second in which to say something to a specific player. After that, it’s hurry back for the coach’s post-game speech, load the bus, and get out of there, leaving minimal opportunities to show true, heartfelt sportsmanship.
What, then, is the solution? In almost all professional sports, the final whistle is followed by several minutes of mingling, shaking hands, and exchanging words with opponents. Some players take the time to congratulate several other players, and some head to the locker room right away. Players that are in the spotlight are commended for displaying good sportsmanship, and criticized when they do not. Thus, this informal system can actually encourage a more positive display of emotions. While it is easy to hide poor sportsmanship behind a mass handshake, leaving the field without talking to or at least shaking hands with an opponent is much more obvious. With the right influences from coaches or parents, a player would be more likely to linger on the field and find a few people to congratulate. Even if it starts only as another ritual, it is possible that the more personal interaction could change the player’s attitude.
Sportsmanship is an honorable display of character that athletes should strive to learn. Few ways of learning are more effective than simply putting something into practice, and an unstructured post-game system would allow an open setting for high schoolers to do so. When the whistle blows, will they be in a learning environment, or a ritualistic one?
Friday, February 12, 2010
Ode to the Miscellaneous things on my dresser
To Silly Putty, the wondrous egg of childhood fun. I take it out and squish and squeeze. Then am reminded that air bubbles only pop so many ways and I put it back.
To Chinese Chess, Set, and other multiplayer games, sometimes I wish I were Zaphod Beeblebrox, or some other being with two heads, so I could play myself.
To my small collection of bobbleheads, sitting there perfectly still. You'd think I would put them on the floor. Or somewhere else where they could collect natural vibrations from around the house activities.
To the Lord of the Rings/The Hobbit box set, whoever put it into production quite miscalculated the space required. Cause now that the books have been taken out and read, the wear has rendered them wider than they were before, and The Two Towers must now be put in backwards for them all to fit. And it's still a tight squeeze.
To several decks of cards. I take you out hoping for some great mind boggling idea for a magic trick...and end up playing a mind numbing game of solitaire.
To my mug full of pens and pencils. I hate using pencils and all the pens are dead. Yet I still have my mug full of pens and pencils.
To the book Great Lies to Tell Small Kids, if you ever get the chance, you should read it.
To the thing with three pegs and a stack of rings that progressively get bigger on one of the pegs, perhaps it will provide about 10 seconds of puzzle solving until I remember how I did it last time.
To mom's tape and scissors, looks like I forgot to give those back. I guess I should go do that now.
To Chinese Chess, Set, and other multiplayer games, sometimes I wish I were Zaphod Beeblebrox, or some other being with two heads, so I could play myself.
To my small collection of bobbleheads, sitting there perfectly still. You'd think I would put them on the floor. Or somewhere else where they could collect natural vibrations from around the house activities.
To the Lord of the Rings/The Hobbit box set, whoever put it into production quite miscalculated the space required. Cause now that the books have been taken out and read, the wear has rendered them wider than they were before, and The Two Towers must now be put in backwards for them all to fit. And it's still a tight squeeze.
To several decks of cards. I take you out hoping for some great mind boggling idea for a magic trick...and end up playing a mind numbing game of solitaire.
To my mug full of pens and pencils. I hate using pencils and all the pens are dead. Yet I still have my mug full of pens and pencils.
To the book Great Lies to Tell Small Kids, if you ever get the chance, you should read it.
To the thing with three pegs and a stack of rings that progressively get bigger on one of the pegs, perhaps it will provide about 10 seconds of puzzle solving until I remember how I did it last time.
To mom's tape and scissors, looks like I forgot to give those back. I guess I should go do that now.
Monday, February 8, 2010
Super Bowl 44
The following is a run through of the Super Bowl from my perspective. All of this is what I wrote down at the time (though elaborated, since I didn’t have time to write everything down. Anything added after the game will be between “*”s). Enter my mind as I watched the game.
5:24- Pregame has been going for a while. Interviews of various players, past and present, including one of Plaxico Burress in jail. And just two years ago he was catching a Super Bowl winning touchdown. But the real point of interest here is the Peyton Manning interview. It was normal, nothing out of the ordinary, until they cued up the Jason Bourne theme in the background. At first I laughed, cause Peyton Manning doesn’t exactly make you think ‘super spy,” but the more I thought about it, what other player in the NFL would be more comparable to Jason Bourne? Peyton’s the best. Everyone wants to beat him. Everyone’s after him. Perhaps the position of running back in general would more accurately fit the ever chased Bourne profile, but I maintain that Peyton is football’s Jason Bourne.
5:29- The Super Bowl is known for advertisements, but what had to be the best marketing moment, *and after seeing all the commercials, I still agree* was before all the big commercials started. The add started with famous clips of Miss Teen South Carolina trying to explain American’s geographical ineptitude. All the viewers laugh. Then it shows Miss S. Carolina participating in “The Amazing Race.” Trust me. People will sit and watch that show just hoping someone asks S. Carolina a question. Ratings will skyrocket. Until S. Carolina is eliminated.
5:50- I’ve known a few Australians. Does anyone really have as strong of an accent as the voice for The Outback’s commercials?
5:52- Pregame analyst’s picks go 3-1 in favor of the Colts. I’m going to have to say 33-28 Colts. But go Saints.
6:08- They introduce the Saints, the crowd goes wild, and the players storm onto the field. And Saints coach Sean Payton stands there with a monotonous look on his face that in such an exciting moment could surely only be rivaled by Andy Reid.
6:12- Pizza Hut runs their $10 for any topping, any crust, any size commercial. With that deal, why would anyone get a small?
6:17- Players have taken the field, everyone is ready. All we have to do yet is sing the national anthem and flip the coin, right? Well, wait, first the Man of the Year award. Okay, it’s a nice gesture to do that on such a big stage. Oh, and then Queen Latifa sings “America the Beautiful.” Have we gotten so patriotic that now we need TWO “USA” songs? Our national anthem isn’t enough? But that’s not the outrage. One of the big Super Bowl betting lines was the over/under on how long it would take Carrie Underwood to sing the national anthem. But where were the betting lines on Queen Latifa? What if I wanted to bet the over on America the Beautiful? Nowhere did I see that opportunity. I could have lost 3 different bets before kickoff! (for those of you who don’t know me that well, insert sarcasm)
6:20- Sure, having people signing the lyrics to the national anthem is a nice gesture, but I’m quite certain that if I were deaf, the words to the national anthem are would be last on my list of things I wanted signed. I know the lyrics, it’s the national anthem! Would I like to know what the announcers are saying while a confusing play is being reviewed? Certainly.
6:23- Commercial comparing the design/engineering of golf clubs to the flight of a falcon and a fighter jet. There’s no way golf clubs are that complicated.
6:27- NFC wins the coin toss for the 13th year in a row…and there go the announcers stealing my thunder. Shoot, they even gave you the odds of that happening. Well, they weren’t the only ones aware of the possibility going into the coin toss, I was ready to pounce on that statistic as soon as the coin hit the ground, and I don’t even have teams of people feeding me all kinds of info. Kudos to me.
6:29- Colts cover the opening kickoff well. No Devon Hester repeat.
6:30- Dwight Freeney looks crippled. Don’t expect much from him.
6:33- Classic Manning to Clark across the middle to get the Colts started.
6:42- If people would have just waited and watched the Tebow commercial before making it into a huge controversy, I doubt people would have even realized it was a Pro-life add. No emphasis on Mrs. Tebow going against doctor’s advice to abort, just her saying how she almost lost him so many times. Had I not known the back story, I would have thought it was just a story about a difficult pregnancy. Good idea, Focus on the Family, bad execution.
6:48- Every time they show Manning on the sideline, I can only wish McNabb had that kind of focus and determination.
6:49- Tons of kids dream of playing in the Super Bowl and having highlights of you shown in slow motion. I doubt that when Marcus Colston was a kid he pictured that moment as him being the only player in the screen and letting a pass go right through his hands. He got good reps on the number of replays though.
6:52- CIS commercial. Somebody just made a killing selling the “slap in the back of the head” sound effect.
7:00- Correct me if I’m wrong, but that was probably the first time in Super Bowl history that someone with a last name that means “Boy” scored a touchdown.
7:03- Holding is called on the Saints during the ensuing kickoff, backing them up to the 10 yard line. As they go to another commercial break, the announcer says, “Things just got a little harder for Drew Brees and the Saints.” That’s the kind of analysis that they get paid the big bucks for.
7:06- After returning from a commercial break and only showing the kickoff before showing more commercials, the Saints run one play that takes us to the end of the first quarter. More commercials.
7:09- This really reminds me of last year’s Super Bowl. The Steelers dominated the first quarter to take a 10-0 lead. We’re still in for a game.
7:11- Probably a good call on the late hit out of bounds, but I have to wonder what defenders are supposed to do in that situation. The ball carrier *I think it was Reggie Bush* was turning the corner and diving close to the first down marker along the side line. It’s a race to the side line to pick up the first down or prevent the first down. If the defender pulls up at all, he makes it. If the defender doesn’t slow down and hits him in midair just moments after he goes out of bounds (which in real speed is virtually no time to react) it’s a 15 yard penalty. Seems like a lose-lose situation for the defender.
7:15- Haha. Great slo-mo shot of an official ducking a pass and simultaneously turning to watch the play.
7:20- Can we start a petition right now to not have two commercials in a row featuring guys not wearing pants?
7:28- The just showed Dwight Freeney highlights. I’m wrong already. But in my defense, apart from the sack, none of those highlights would have been shown if he weren’t battling an injury.
7:31- Wide Receiver Reverse: The ultimate second guess plays. The play bombed. A 7 yard loss. So we call it a terrible play call.
7:37- 3rd and goal at the 1 and they’re already talking about whether they should or shouldn’t go for it on 4th down.
7:38- A coach with the guts to go for it on 4th and goal after LOSING yards on 3rd down. I like it.
7:41- Colts make the stop: Manning greatness to ensue.
7:43- cough…ehem…I mean…three run plays and out is great, too…
7:46- the Saints just ran up and spiked the ball, letting a mere 10 seconds or so off the clock. McNabb was watching that, right? Brees didn’t line up behind the wrong lineman, nor did he fake back and forth before trying to spike the ball and end up getting sacked. Watch and learn, Donovan.
7:49- Halftime stat: colts 11-1 when leading at halftime. May I ask how that’s relevant? They won every game they tried to win and lost the games they didn’t try to win. So let’s try this one for size: Colts are 16-2 in games that they reached halftime.
7:50- So I really wanted to make a prediction that defenses would surprise a lot of people, and with a 10-6 halftime score, I would have been right. But alas I didn’t have the guts. Largely because I thought that no matter what the defenses did, scoring would take off in the second half. So offense, bail me out, please!
7:54- Bill Cowher says how much he loved Sean Payton’s decision to go for it on 4th and goal from the 1 ½ yard line, because you have to play to win! Um, Bill, may I remind you of a certain AFC Championship game you coached against the Patriots? The Steelers were down by 13 points with about 10 minutes left and faced a 4th and goal from the 2. Did Bill Cowher “play to win?” Nope. He kicked a field goal! So, Bill, don’t try and act like you would have done the same.
7:58- “The Who” are doing the halftime show. Now think of your favorite current day band. I have good news! They might do the Super Bowl halftime show! …in about 30 or 40 years.
Several times during halftime- Thanks to Andy Hock for pointing this one out. One of the camera men must share my opinion of the halftime show, as several times they showed the lead singer…with a clock behind him counting down the time until halftime ends.
8:20- Onside kick! Who Dat gonna recover dat ball?
8:25- That onside kick really fired up the players. Lots of extracurricular activity going on after the plays. Expect more.
8:26- Screen pass to Pierre Thomas for a touchdown. Wow, that catch and run took me back to the Brian Westbrook glory days.
8:29- Yup, tempers are flaring.
8:34- Thing of beauty pass from Manning to Dallas Clark. Dropped perfectly into Clark’s hands over two jumping defenders. *and a great sideline shot of the play as we headed into the next commercial break*
8:35- 7:30 left in the 3rd quarter, and it happened. I started trying to visualize the post game celebration. My desire to know the future has irrevocably kicked in now. I will now overanalyze each score and lead change into trying to predict the final outcome.
8:36- A Joseph Addai rushing touchdown…and they show the Manning family cheering in their luxury box. Well, they had to show the Mannings at some point, I guess.
8:43- Still waiting for the Saints to go downfield. Apart from the long incompletion on their first possession, everything’s been short.
8:47- In order for my final score prediction to come true, all we need is the Colts to score 16 more points, and the Saints 12. I’d say my chances are zero.
8:50- Very much enjoyed the shot of Jeremy Shockey, who was once one of my most disliked players, getting crunched in slow motion.
9:01- Very impressed with the officiating so far. I don’t have a thing to complain about (apart from the previously mentioned dispute over the late hit out of bounds rule). Hopefully I didn’t just jinx it.
9:05- Visio Droid commercial. Whoever thought to bring back the fat guy dancing to the Numa Numa song is a genious.
9:08- Nine minutes left in the game and it seems like there’s been a whole lot more offense than 17-16.
9:13- That official made the most of his 5 seconds of fame while calling the 2 point conversion attempt incomplete. Drastic incomplete signal, followed by an over emphatic juggling motion, followed by another dramatic incomplete signal or two.
9:16- Upon review, the 2 point conversion is good! If not, a serious rant will follow.
9:17- The official that made the call after the challenge did NOT make the most of his 5 seconds of fame.
9:25- The eco-friendly police take the cake as the worst commercial
9:27- Did not see that interception coming. I’m kinda bummed, though. I expected the Colts to tie it up, and then we’d get to see Drew Brees try to define his career by taking his team down the field for the game winning score with at least less than three minutes left. Instead, we get to see Peyton Manning try to build on his already defined career by trying to score two touchdowns in three minutes. It’ll be exciting if he does it, but if he doesn’t, not so much.
9:35- Long pass play takes us to the 2 minute warning with the Colts in good field position. Three time outs left, and they might make this interesting yet.
9:40- Anyone doubting how great Peyton Manning is, should think about this: What other QB could be down by 14 with 1:30 left and make you think, “Hey, they still have 3 timeouts! If they score here and stop the Saints, he’ll get the ball back with no time outs and a whole minute to go the length of the field. Look out saints!” *of course perhaps I was the only one to think this. And perhaps rightfully so. But it’s an interesting thought, nonetheless.*
9:41- 3rd down from the 4 and they run it? Along with Peyton calling a timeout that he regretted moments later, there goes the theory listed above.
9:42- Impressive win for the Saints.
9:43- Shot of Saints owner celebrating. Good thing for him it didn’t come down to a field goal.
9:44- The Saints know teamwork…except when it comes to not getting in the way of the guys trying to douse the coach in Gatorade. Ah, well, though. It’s their first ever championship.
That wraps up my timeline. Now for some post game thoughts.
This Super Bowl was a lot more bland than last year in that I don’t have any horrible calls to complain about, nor do I have John Madden to make fun of (though I hate to do it, I must admit that I really did miss having Madden ramble his way through the Super Bowl). But there were several interesting moments to comment on throughout the game.
Perhaps the most subtly strange was during an NFL commercial there was a short shot of a kid wearing a Brett Favre Jets jersey. You’d think the NFL would stay up to date on that kind of thing.
The onside kick to start the second half was unlike anything I’ve ever seen. It was certainly the “yup, it’s the Super Bowl” moment, as players ignored officials trying to clear up the scrum pile and kept going back in. I’ve never seen a fumble pile take anywhere close to that long to sort out, nor have I ever seen both teams that entirely convinced that they had come up with the ball.
Undervalued play of the Game would have to go to Lance Moore and his 2 point conversion catch. Not only was it an incredibly athletic fusion of the catch and the stretch into one motion, but we didn’t realize he had done anything special until we saw the replays (the game shot just showed his back, and looked like an incomplete pass), and at that point we were all focusing on whether or not he scored. In addition as the Colts started driving back down the field, those 2 points put the Colt’s backs against the wall and gave the Saints breathing room. After all, worst case scenario, if the Colts score, it’s tied. Without those 2 points, a Colts score would put the Saints against however much clock was left to get a field goal. Am I saying that Tracy Porter might not have been sitting on Reggie Wayne’s route quite so much if a touchdown would have put them behind? Not necessarily, the Saints play and aggressive defense, so it’s likely he would have made the interception anyway, however that is something to think about.
The post game interviews are notorious for players/coaches/owners going overboard in proclaiming their fans/city/players/coaches/etc to be the very best. We had that. But the Saints owner took it to a whole new level, saying that the City of New Orleans and the State of Louisiana were “Back and showed the whole world.” Understandable enthusiasm, yet pathetic world view. Sure, a few people around the world watch the Super Bowl to see what American Football is all about, but they were proven nothing. Come to think of it, nothing was proved to me about New Orleans or Louisiana by the Saints winning the Super Bowl.
A long, lingering shot of Drew Brees holding his 1ish son during the postgame celebration led to my favorite announcing line: “That’s the most precious moment that he could share with his son.” Change the word “share” to “have” and I’ll agree. But I’m pretty sure that while it was a great moment for Drew Brees, all that was running through the kid’s head was, “Why is everyone yelling? Hey look, it’s raining paper. I don’t feel this small around most people. Where’s mom?”
So another season is in the wraps. While it’s nice to see a little guy win here and there, it was very enjoyable to see the #1 seeds from both conferences face off in the Super Bowl. They were the best from start to finish, well done by both of them. The game won’t go down as a Super Bowl great, but it was a good game with few turnovers and few penalties. Simply two great teams going at each other, a treat we don’t get in this magnitude very often.
-Ben Herr
5:24- Pregame has been going for a while. Interviews of various players, past and present, including one of Plaxico Burress in jail. And just two years ago he was catching a Super Bowl winning touchdown. But the real point of interest here is the Peyton Manning interview. It was normal, nothing out of the ordinary, until they cued up the Jason Bourne theme in the background. At first I laughed, cause Peyton Manning doesn’t exactly make you think ‘super spy,” but the more I thought about it, what other player in the NFL would be more comparable to Jason Bourne? Peyton’s the best. Everyone wants to beat him. Everyone’s after him. Perhaps the position of running back in general would more accurately fit the ever chased Bourne profile, but I maintain that Peyton is football’s Jason Bourne.
5:29- The Super Bowl is known for advertisements, but what had to be the best marketing moment, *and after seeing all the commercials, I still agree* was before all the big commercials started. The add started with famous clips of Miss Teen South Carolina trying to explain American’s geographical ineptitude. All the viewers laugh. Then it shows Miss S. Carolina participating in “The Amazing Race.” Trust me. People will sit and watch that show just hoping someone asks S. Carolina a question. Ratings will skyrocket. Until S. Carolina is eliminated.
5:50- I’ve known a few Australians. Does anyone really have as strong of an accent as the voice for The Outback’s commercials?
5:52- Pregame analyst’s picks go 3-1 in favor of the Colts. I’m going to have to say 33-28 Colts. But go Saints.
6:08- They introduce the Saints, the crowd goes wild, and the players storm onto the field. And Saints coach Sean Payton stands there with a monotonous look on his face that in such an exciting moment could surely only be rivaled by Andy Reid.
6:12- Pizza Hut runs their $10 for any topping, any crust, any size commercial. With that deal, why would anyone get a small?
6:17- Players have taken the field, everyone is ready. All we have to do yet is sing the national anthem and flip the coin, right? Well, wait, first the Man of the Year award. Okay, it’s a nice gesture to do that on such a big stage. Oh, and then Queen Latifa sings “America the Beautiful.” Have we gotten so patriotic that now we need TWO “USA” songs? Our national anthem isn’t enough? But that’s not the outrage. One of the big Super Bowl betting lines was the over/under on how long it would take Carrie Underwood to sing the national anthem. But where were the betting lines on Queen Latifa? What if I wanted to bet the over on America the Beautiful? Nowhere did I see that opportunity. I could have lost 3 different bets before kickoff! (for those of you who don’t know me that well, insert sarcasm)
6:20- Sure, having people signing the lyrics to the national anthem is a nice gesture, but I’m quite certain that if I were deaf, the words to the national anthem are would be last on my list of things I wanted signed. I know the lyrics, it’s the national anthem! Would I like to know what the announcers are saying while a confusing play is being reviewed? Certainly.
6:23- Commercial comparing the design/engineering of golf clubs to the flight of a falcon and a fighter jet. There’s no way golf clubs are that complicated.
6:27- NFC wins the coin toss for the 13th year in a row…and there go the announcers stealing my thunder. Shoot, they even gave you the odds of that happening. Well, they weren’t the only ones aware of the possibility going into the coin toss, I was ready to pounce on that statistic as soon as the coin hit the ground, and I don’t even have teams of people feeding me all kinds of info. Kudos to me.
6:29- Colts cover the opening kickoff well. No Devon Hester repeat.
6:30- Dwight Freeney looks crippled. Don’t expect much from him.
6:33- Classic Manning to Clark across the middle to get the Colts started.
6:42- If people would have just waited and watched the Tebow commercial before making it into a huge controversy, I doubt people would have even realized it was a Pro-life add. No emphasis on Mrs. Tebow going against doctor’s advice to abort, just her saying how she almost lost him so many times. Had I not known the back story, I would have thought it was just a story about a difficult pregnancy. Good idea, Focus on the Family, bad execution.
6:48- Every time they show Manning on the sideline, I can only wish McNabb had that kind of focus and determination.
6:49- Tons of kids dream of playing in the Super Bowl and having highlights of you shown in slow motion. I doubt that when Marcus Colston was a kid he pictured that moment as him being the only player in the screen and letting a pass go right through his hands. He got good reps on the number of replays though.
6:52- CIS commercial. Somebody just made a killing selling the “slap in the back of the head” sound effect.
7:00- Correct me if I’m wrong, but that was probably the first time in Super Bowl history that someone with a last name that means “Boy” scored a touchdown.
7:03- Holding is called on the Saints during the ensuing kickoff, backing them up to the 10 yard line. As they go to another commercial break, the announcer says, “Things just got a little harder for Drew Brees and the Saints.” That’s the kind of analysis that they get paid the big bucks for.
7:06- After returning from a commercial break and only showing the kickoff before showing more commercials, the Saints run one play that takes us to the end of the first quarter. More commercials.
7:09- This really reminds me of last year’s Super Bowl. The Steelers dominated the first quarter to take a 10-0 lead. We’re still in for a game.
7:11- Probably a good call on the late hit out of bounds, but I have to wonder what defenders are supposed to do in that situation. The ball carrier *I think it was Reggie Bush* was turning the corner and diving close to the first down marker along the side line. It’s a race to the side line to pick up the first down or prevent the first down. If the defender pulls up at all, he makes it. If the defender doesn’t slow down and hits him in midair just moments after he goes out of bounds (which in real speed is virtually no time to react) it’s a 15 yard penalty. Seems like a lose-lose situation for the defender.
7:15- Haha. Great slo-mo shot of an official ducking a pass and simultaneously turning to watch the play.
7:20- Can we start a petition right now to not have two commercials in a row featuring guys not wearing pants?
7:28- The just showed Dwight Freeney highlights. I’m wrong already. But in my defense, apart from the sack, none of those highlights would have been shown if he weren’t battling an injury.
7:31- Wide Receiver Reverse: The ultimate second guess plays. The play bombed. A 7 yard loss. So we call it a terrible play call.
7:37- 3rd and goal at the 1 and they’re already talking about whether they should or shouldn’t go for it on 4th down.
7:38- A coach with the guts to go for it on 4th and goal after LOSING yards on 3rd down. I like it.
7:41- Colts make the stop: Manning greatness to ensue.
7:43- cough…ehem…I mean…three run plays and out is great, too…
7:46- the Saints just ran up and spiked the ball, letting a mere 10 seconds or so off the clock. McNabb was watching that, right? Brees didn’t line up behind the wrong lineman, nor did he fake back and forth before trying to spike the ball and end up getting sacked. Watch and learn, Donovan.
7:49- Halftime stat: colts 11-1 when leading at halftime. May I ask how that’s relevant? They won every game they tried to win and lost the games they didn’t try to win. So let’s try this one for size: Colts are 16-2 in games that they reached halftime.
7:50- So I really wanted to make a prediction that defenses would surprise a lot of people, and with a 10-6 halftime score, I would have been right. But alas I didn’t have the guts. Largely because I thought that no matter what the defenses did, scoring would take off in the second half. So offense, bail me out, please!
7:54- Bill Cowher says how much he loved Sean Payton’s decision to go for it on 4th and goal from the 1 ½ yard line, because you have to play to win! Um, Bill, may I remind you of a certain AFC Championship game you coached against the Patriots? The Steelers were down by 13 points with about 10 minutes left and faced a 4th and goal from the 2. Did Bill Cowher “play to win?” Nope. He kicked a field goal! So, Bill, don’t try and act like you would have done the same.
7:58- “The Who” are doing the halftime show. Now think of your favorite current day band. I have good news! They might do the Super Bowl halftime show! …in about 30 or 40 years.
Several times during halftime- Thanks to Andy Hock for pointing this one out. One of the camera men must share my opinion of the halftime show, as several times they showed the lead singer…with a clock behind him counting down the time until halftime ends.
8:20- Onside kick! Who Dat gonna recover dat ball?
8:25- That onside kick really fired up the players. Lots of extracurricular activity going on after the plays. Expect more.
8:26- Screen pass to Pierre Thomas for a touchdown. Wow, that catch and run took me back to the Brian Westbrook glory days.
8:29- Yup, tempers are flaring.
8:34- Thing of beauty pass from Manning to Dallas Clark. Dropped perfectly into Clark’s hands over two jumping defenders. *and a great sideline shot of the play as we headed into the next commercial break*
8:35- 7:30 left in the 3rd quarter, and it happened. I started trying to visualize the post game celebration. My desire to know the future has irrevocably kicked in now. I will now overanalyze each score and lead change into trying to predict the final outcome.
8:36- A Joseph Addai rushing touchdown…and they show the Manning family cheering in their luxury box. Well, they had to show the Mannings at some point, I guess.
8:43- Still waiting for the Saints to go downfield. Apart from the long incompletion on their first possession, everything’s been short.
8:47- In order for my final score prediction to come true, all we need is the Colts to score 16 more points, and the Saints 12. I’d say my chances are zero.
8:50- Very much enjoyed the shot of Jeremy Shockey, who was once one of my most disliked players, getting crunched in slow motion.
9:01- Very impressed with the officiating so far. I don’t have a thing to complain about (apart from the previously mentioned dispute over the late hit out of bounds rule). Hopefully I didn’t just jinx it.
9:05- Visio Droid commercial. Whoever thought to bring back the fat guy dancing to the Numa Numa song is a genious.
9:08- Nine minutes left in the game and it seems like there’s been a whole lot more offense than 17-16.
9:13- That official made the most of his 5 seconds of fame while calling the 2 point conversion attempt incomplete. Drastic incomplete signal, followed by an over emphatic juggling motion, followed by another dramatic incomplete signal or two.
9:16- Upon review, the 2 point conversion is good! If not, a serious rant will follow.
9:17- The official that made the call after the challenge did NOT make the most of his 5 seconds of fame.
9:25- The eco-friendly police take the cake as the worst commercial
9:27- Did not see that interception coming. I’m kinda bummed, though. I expected the Colts to tie it up, and then we’d get to see Drew Brees try to define his career by taking his team down the field for the game winning score with at least less than three minutes left. Instead, we get to see Peyton Manning try to build on his already defined career by trying to score two touchdowns in three minutes. It’ll be exciting if he does it, but if he doesn’t, not so much.
9:35- Long pass play takes us to the 2 minute warning with the Colts in good field position. Three time outs left, and they might make this interesting yet.
9:40- Anyone doubting how great Peyton Manning is, should think about this: What other QB could be down by 14 with 1:30 left and make you think, “Hey, they still have 3 timeouts! If they score here and stop the Saints, he’ll get the ball back with no time outs and a whole minute to go the length of the field. Look out saints!” *of course perhaps I was the only one to think this. And perhaps rightfully so. But it’s an interesting thought, nonetheless.*
9:41- 3rd down from the 4 and they run it? Along with Peyton calling a timeout that he regretted moments later, there goes the theory listed above.
9:42- Impressive win for the Saints.
9:43- Shot of Saints owner celebrating. Good thing for him it didn’t come down to a field goal.
9:44- The Saints know teamwork…except when it comes to not getting in the way of the guys trying to douse the coach in Gatorade. Ah, well, though. It’s their first ever championship.
That wraps up my timeline. Now for some post game thoughts.
This Super Bowl was a lot more bland than last year in that I don’t have any horrible calls to complain about, nor do I have John Madden to make fun of (though I hate to do it, I must admit that I really did miss having Madden ramble his way through the Super Bowl). But there were several interesting moments to comment on throughout the game.
Perhaps the most subtly strange was during an NFL commercial there was a short shot of a kid wearing a Brett Favre Jets jersey. You’d think the NFL would stay up to date on that kind of thing.
The onside kick to start the second half was unlike anything I’ve ever seen. It was certainly the “yup, it’s the Super Bowl” moment, as players ignored officials trying to clear up the scrum pile and kept going back in. I’ve never seen a fumble pile take anywhere close to that long to sort out, nor have I ever seen both teams that entirely convinced that they had come up with the ball.
Undervalued play of the Game would have to go to Lance Moore and his 2 point conversion catch. Not only was it an incredibly athletic fusion of the catch and the stretch into one motion, but we didn’t realize he had done anything special until we saw the replays (the game shot just showed his back, and looked like an incomplete pass), and at that point we were all focusing on whether or not he scored. In addition as the Colts started driving back down the field, those 2 points put the Colt’s backs against the wall and gave the Saints breathing room. After all, worst case scenario, if the Colts score, it’s tied. Without those 2 points, a Colts score would put the Saints against however much clock was left to get a field goal. Am I saying that Tracy Porter might not have been sitting on Reggie Wayne’s route quite so much if a touchdown would have put them behind? Not necessarily, the Saints play and aggressive defense, so it’s likely he would have made the interception anyway, however that is something to think about.
The post game interviews are notorious for players/coaches/owners going overboard in proclaiming their fans/city/players/coaches/etc to be the very best. We had that. But the Saints owner took it to a whole new level, saying that the City of New Orleans and the State of Louisiana were “Back and showed the whole world.” Understandable enthusiasm, yet pathetic world view. Sure, a few people around the world watch the Super Bowl to see what American Football is all about, but they were proven nothing. Come to think of it, nothing was proved to me about New Orleans or Louisiana by the Saints winning the Super Bowl.
A long, lingering shot of Drew Brees holding his 1ish son during the postgame celebration led to my favorite announcing line: “That’s the most precious moment that he could share with his son.” Change the word “share” to “have” and I’ll agree. But I’m pretty sure that while it was a great moment for Drew Brees, all that was running through the kid’s head was, “Why is everyone yelling? Hey look, it’s raining paper. I don’t feel this small around most people. Where’s mom?”
So another season is in the wraps. While it’s nice to see a little guy win here and there, it was very enjoyable to see the #1 seeds from both conferences face off in the Super Bowl. They were the best from start to finish, well done by both of them. The game won’t go down as a Super Bowl great, but it was a good game with few turnovers and few penalties. Simply two great teams going at each other, a treat we don’t get in this magnitude very often.
-Ben Herr
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Say What?
It's not very often that I laugh when I hear about a new reality TV show. The premises of shows have become either completely ridiculous (Amish in the City!!!) or incredibly repetitive (I hear Octo-mom is getting a show to go along with all the other ones about families with tons of kids), but a series that is about to start filming isn't one where the idea is out there, but rather...well, here's the basis:
A pro athlete will challenge other pro athletes in their respective sports. He will take on Ben Roethlisberger in some sort of a football challenge, Michael Phelps in swimming, Oscar de la Hoya in boxing, Albert Pujols in baseball, Serena Williams in tennis, Misty May-Trenor and Kerri Walsh in beach volley ball, and is hoping to book Lance Armstrong in cycling when the Tour de France is finished.
This is actually something I've wanted to see for quite a while. Sure I'd prefer whole teams going at each other in different sports, but this would have done quite nicely. The star of the series says that he came up with the idea and figure fans "would really want to see an athlete play another sport." Indeed I would. I would love to see a Lebron James, a Ladanian Tomlinson, a Derek Jeter, a Tiger Woods, a Lance Armstrong, or some elite athlete switch sports for a bit (though the Michael Jordan experiment was an utter disaster). Unfortunately, that's not what we get here. We get Shaquille O'neal. Yup, we get all 7'1" of him. And all 325 pounds of him. Yes, it's okay to laugh as the mental pictures start flooding your mind. Yes, Shaq is (or at least was) an elite basketball player. But for his size and his ability to use it. He may be extremely athletic relative to his size, but... a 7'1" body doesn't cut through water at all like Phelps does. And the thought of him trying to hustle back and forth from one side of the tennis court to the other as Serena Williams calmly places the ball on alternate sidelines is quite amusing.
While Shaq concedes that he isn't very skilled at tennis or baseball (a home run derby), he says he expects to exceed at football and swimming. At swimming? Versus Michael Phelps? Suddenly, Chad Ocho Cinco's claim that he could beat Michael Phelps doesn't sound quite so outlandish.
Where the real catch comes in is that O'neal and his rival will negotiate a handicap. No kidding. And it gets even better with Shaq's quote, "Bragging rights is always better than any monetary prize" in response to the fact that there won't be a cash prize to the winner of the event.
I find the bigger question to be, how could anyone find any reason to brag about winning this event? What are they supposed to say?
"I, Michael Phelps, Olympic record holder and double digit gold medal possessor beat a 325 pound 7 footer who is over ten years my elder in a swimming race?"
"I, Albert Pujols, one of the best sluggers in the major leagues, hit more home runs than a 7'1" NBA center who's hand/eye coordination was only good enough to hit a little over half his free throw attempts?"
And with adequate handicaps figured in, how is Shaq supposed to brag?
"I, Shaquille O'neal, beat Serena Williams in a tennis match despite each game starting at 'game point-love' in my favor?"
"I, Shaquille O'neal, beat Lance Armstrong in a cycling race despite the fact that I started at the top of the hill and raced down, and he started at the bottom and raced up?"
I don't know, perhaps I'm misunderestimating the big fellow's athletic prowess. But I do know the handicaps will have to be significant (though probably not quite to the extreme of those mentioned above). Sure, handicaps can be fun in order to level the playing field, but I don't see how any bragging rights can come from winning a handicapped event.
Now don't get me wrong, the show will be plenty entertaining, no doubt (though I doubt I'll ever see any of it). I just have a hunch that "Shaq VS" will be funny for the same reason as, say, tryouts for American Idol are funny.
A pro athlete will challenge other pro athletes in their respective sports. He will take on Ben Roethlisberger in some sort of a football challenge, Michael Phelps in swimming, Oscar de la Hoya in boxing, Albert Pujols in baseball, Serena Williams in tennis, Misty May-Trenor and Kerri Walsh in beach volley ball, and is hoping to book Lance Armstrong in cycling when the Tour de France is finished.
This is actually something I've wanted to see for quite a while. Sure I'd prefer whole teams going at each other in different sports, but this would have done quite nicely. The star of the series says that he came up with the idea and figure fans "would really want to see an athlete play another sport." Indeed I would. I would love to see a Lebron James, a Ladanian Tomlinson, a Derek Jeter, a Tiger Woods, a Lance Armstrong, or some elite athlete switch sports for a bit (though the Michael Jordan experiment was an utter disaster). Unfortunately, that's not what we get here. We get Shaquille O'neal. Yup, we get all 7'1" of him. And all 325 pounds of him. Yes, it's okay to laugh as the mental pictures start flooding your mind. Yes, Shaq is (or at least was) an elite basketball player. But for his size and his ability to use it. He may be extremely athletic relative to his size, but... a 7'1" body doesn't cut through water at all like Phelps does. And the thought of him trying to hustle back and forth from one side of the tennis court to the other as Serena Williams calmly places the ball on alternate sidelines is quite amusing.
While Shaq concedes that he isn't very skilled at tennis or baseball (a home run derby), he says he expects to exceed at football and swimming. At swimming? Versus Michael Phelps? Suddenly, Chad Ocho Cinco's claim that he could beat Michael Phelps doesn't sound quite so outlandish.
Where the real catch comes in is that O'neal and his rival will negotiate a handicap. No kidding. And it gets even better with Shaq's quote, "Bragging rights is always better than any monetary prize" in response to the fact that there won't be a cash prize to the winner of the event.
I find the bigger question to be, how could anyone find any reason to brag about winning this event? What are they supposed to say?
"I, Michael Phelps, Olympic record holder and double digit gold medal possessor beat a 325 pound 7 footer who is over ten years my elder in a swimming race?"
"I, Albert Pujols, one of the best sluggers in the major leagues, hit more home runs than a 7'1" NBA center who's hand/eye coordination was only good enough to hit a little over half his free throw attempts?"
And with adequate handicaps figured in, how is Shaq supposed to brag?
"I, Shaquille O'neal, beat Serena Williams in a tennis match despite each game starting at 'game point-love' in my favor?"
"I, Shaquille O'neal, beat Lance Armstrong in a cycling race despite the fact that I started at the top of the hill and raced down, and he started at the bottom and raced up?"
I don't know, perhaps I'm misunderestimating the big fellow's athletic prowess. But I do know the handicaps will have to be significant (though probably not quite to the extreme of those mentioned above). Sure, handicaps can be fun in order to level the playing field, but I don't see how any bragging rights can come from winning a handicapped event.
Now don't get me wrong, the show will be plenty entertaining, no doubt (though I doubt I'll ever see any of it). I just have a hunch that "Shaq VS" will be funny for the same reason as, say, tryouts for American Idol are funny.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
